ironysoul | RL for Greed;

RL for Greed;

Al had asked for a worldhop on the community. He'd told both Ed and Winry that he was going to Lior, but he could feel the pressure and anger growing inside him. He didn't want to explode again at his father -- Hohenheim was one of the only people left who wasn't pissed at him for something. And he didn't want to be that easy to find.

So instead, he had his ride take him to Dublith. He wove his way through the city streets, passing Sensei's home and the butcher shop, until he made his way to a very familiar bar.

This time of night, even the heaviest drinkers had retired, so Al moved through the darkened bar and into a shadowy corner. There he crouched, his hands resting on his knees, and he waited for some unsuspecting victim -- preferably the homonculus -- to make an appearance.

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"You might not have to beat him up," Greed insisted, blithely missing the point. "One punch might do it."

Still, if the kid had decided he wanted to just talk it out straightly, which he was either too stupid to think of before or had failed before, Greed saw no reason to push his own unwanted advice. Hell, the kid knew his situation and targets better, maybe his own tactic was best. Not his problem. Didn't know. Didn't care. Why he didn't just go talk to the girls in the first place if that was his best idea was a mystery, but he was prepared to think nothing more of it, and to even let a reflective snipe roll off of his back, if it meant getting the uppity self righteous and increasingly useless, over sized kid off his back. If he went to talk it out, maybe they'd research a little harder, perfect their own technique! Then he'd just be an uppity self righteous oversized kid without the useless bit!

But if he was really going to let him go without a kidnapping, he considered his Nice Guy limits already being pushed. Even with the obvious drive for them to improve it on their own if left to their own devices. To come in taunting with immortality was something he would only put up with because the kid was having some end-of-times death based breakdown.

After a long, thoughtful silence, Greed waved dismissively. "My plans usually work. But, more importantly... you gonna fix the shit you broke?"

Greed would offer him the chance, at least. As an example of how well (he thought that) his plans usually worked.

With a fluid shrug, Al clapped his hands together and pressed them to the floor. One transmutation, two new, shiny chairs.

You'd better not try anything funny, Mr. Homonculus! He came here to complain, but he still didn't trust the other man. Uh, creature. He was ready for any move against him as he picked up his phone to call for a ride.

"Thank you for listening to me."

Greed gave the chair a nudge with his foot, then shrugged, satisfied and giving yet another dismissive motion. "Next time you're gonna eat up my time, at least buy somethin'. Bar tenders don't really make their money for mixing drinks."

There didn't seem to be any intent to attack or restrain him, but perhaps he wanted him to let his brother or his ride know where he was first, to save him the trouble of trying to make yet another accidentally unlocked kidnap notification post. His ability with technology left something to be desired.

That would be a paranoid, but justified, thought.

"I can't drink," he reminded the homonculus, rolling his eyes. "You know, I can't drink and I can't have sex. Immortality or not, you'd really hate this body..."

He didn't trust Homonculi, and he never would. He and Envy were going to have fun working that out in post canon.

But for now, he sat quietly against a wall, his device in hand and his eyes open. Especially since he'd made sure his family couldn't find him....

"That's why I'm saying to buy something anyway. You don't pay a bartender for the drinks, you pay 'em to listen to your ass. Didn't I just say that?"

Despite a golden opportunity at what he'd tried and threatened to do several times over, Greed seemed to have fallen into a relaxed slouch in his chair, sipping and passing the time idly with empty conversation. "Drinking's a double dull edged sword, anyway. S'a social thing... 'n if the body can't want it, m'not gonna miss the sex. I can still get what I want out of it, with or without feelin' it."

Al rolled his eyes again. "Mr. Homonculus, are you asking for a tip?"

...Maybe golden. Al would kick his ass if he tried, which would put a bit of a damper on things. But the other...

"This body isn't immortal or even invincible, and you can't do any of your favorite things in it. Well, except fight. Why do you want it so much?"

With yet another bland stare, as if Al had asked a supremely stupid question that wasn't worth the breath of a real answer, he fielded both hanging questions with a single response: "Who do you think I am?"

Yeah, he'd realized it was a stupid question as he'd asked it.

"I know you want everything, but this body.... it's not worth it."

"You can say that right now 'cause you think of it like some kinda time bomb," Greed insisted, blithely ignoring the fact that the boy had spent years trying to return to his human body before knowing a time limit or end was drawing near. After all, it was perfectly possible to hop into a body, to only have to worry about the rotting as some kind of biological break down--and metal didn't have to deal with the same biological cycle as naturally living things. It was hardly his fault they hadn't done it right. He'd SEEN it done right... why she kept choosing a flesh and blood body, he'd pretend not to know.

"I've always said that."

Al crossed his arms. "Having your soul and body split in two... You never feel right. There's always something missing."

Greed meant always wanting something else, that something was always missing. Even if he could sympathize with that sensation it was something that couldn't be compared; that gap had to be smaller than the one of his own level of greed. If Greed's answer seemed to come after a slight pause, he'd insist that it was all in Al's imagination.

"Lotsa people feel that way in their own bodies. It's called puberty or existentialism or angst or something."

Al slumped against the wall.

"No wonder you and Brother get along so well. It would just kill you to admit I might have a point, wouldn't it?"

"Oi, oi. Didn't I let it go that maybe they're really treatin' you like shit instead of it bein' in your head? I can't think of your big Happy Family doin' that to you, but, shit, I don't get the whole family thing or whatever your relationships are anyway, and you're the one in that situation so I'll leave it to you to have a better idea what's goin' on and what to do about it. Even if you're already not handlin' it right.

You're the one not gettin' that you don't get me. You don't really get my kinda greed, 'n you don't got a reason to try to, but assumin' I don't know what I want... that's about the same as writing you off as havin' a childish tantrum, ain't it?"

"Okay." Honestly, it wasn't worth it to argue with Al. What did he care if the homonculus was hellbent on pursuing this path. He stood when his ride arrived and ducked a quick bow.

"Thank you for listening to me, Mr. Homonculus."

And still no tip. After taunting him with the brink of immortality, not leaving a tip would have been grounds to recycle the tin can. At the very least, Greed was certain that having his time eaten for nothing, and not kidnapping him, meant that he was freed of any obligation to return such warm words as a 'you're welcome'.

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RL for Greed;

Swore I responded to this! Sorry for the delay.

No big!

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